Tuesday, June 28, 2011
fire flys
We are starting to get into the dail grind of summer. However I can't seem to get into a real routine. Things just pop up and then the day is over. What I really want to do is catch fire flys with my guys. I see them when the sun goes down and want to run outside with the boys and catch them and release them. However, I worry will this wild up Brandon so much he won't sleep> Do I not worry until it is done? Will he keep everyone else awake because he can't sleep? Thes unknow make me stop and think about this. I have to not worry and just have some fun. The boys deserve it. I deserve it. so I will let you know.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Camp Anikijig
One is off to camp. Brandon went to a mini camp in Wisconsin. He should be able to ride a horse and do some archery. If it stops raining. It is only in the 60's up north and they have to take a swim test. Ouch he hates the cold and it will be a big challenge for him.
Another challenge will be the shoes he wears. He struggles with putting on his high tops most times but wanted to bring them or should I say had to bring them with all of his choices. It can be exhausting ... I try to let him pick his pair of shoes but he struggles to get them on (wont losen them enough) and when he ties them... the laces have to match exactly- never mind that he always pulls from one side of his shoe laces to tighten, they still have to match... Explaining this has become mute but I try too. I don't know why so we will have to practice for school.
Josh has been home being a big video geek. A bit too much that I have to put a lid on this today. There is fun and then you can have fun running around outside. So we will have to make some adjustments to this. THis is suppose to be my time with my son... only he wants to play with his friend and have a friend over all the time. Which is what a normal 4th grader would do I know but I feel left out and that is ok. He will just hang with me eventually. I hope. We still have more time. Brandon calls tonight to see if he wants to stay or not. It will be interesting. If he stays, then Josh and I have 3 more days to hang and do things together. What we will do I don't know, we have seen a movie with his friend ...
Another challenge will be the shoes he wears. He struggles with putting on his high tops most times but wanted to bring them or should I say had to bring them with all of his choices. It can be exhausting ... I try to let him pick his pair of shoes but he struggles to get them on (wont losen them enough) and when he ties them... the laces have to match exactly- never mind that he always pulls from one side of his shoe laces to tighten, they still have to match... Explaining this has become mute but I try too. I don't know why so we will have to practice for school.
Josh has been home being a big video geek. A bit too much that I have to put a lid on this today. There is fun and then you can have fun running around outside. So we will have to make some adjustments to this. THis is suppose to be my time with my son... only he wants to play with his friend and have a friend over all the time. Which is what a normal 4th grader would do I know but I feel left out and that is ok. He will just hang with me eventually. I hope. We still have more time. Brandon calls tonight to see if he wants to stay or not. It will be interesting. If he stays, then Josh and I have 3 more days to hang and do things together. What we will do I don't know, we have seen a movie with his friend ...
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Our Trip
It seems it was a bit overwhelming for Brandon on our trip. I know the mornings are hard because he can't figure out what the day will be like. It really isn't mapped in stone, however once we get going he does great. However, his eating schedule was a bit goofed up and so when we were all starving he was not hungry. It is so hard to get him to eat when he is like that, and snacks can only help a little bit.
So we had a few moments of discomfort. Brandon is still trying to have his temper tantrums like a two year old even though he is 10. He struggles with this and we struggle with this. Huge emotions for little things become exhausting for us. It is not ok to disrupt everyone when you are upset. You may be upset but making everyone miserable is not good. Disrespect has become his way of dealing and we need to teach him how to be upset but not get everyone upset. It is ok to be angry or upset but making it a huge emotion and being disrespectful is not. He is trying but he keeps forgetting. I read in another blog how they have manage to get their child to start regulating herself. Brandon does not, and some days I feel he can't and some days I feel he won't try. But I know he is trying, he can't remember what to do so we have to practice. We have to go through routines to help him. Make him stop and just sit by us and breathe. He is getting better but we have a long road to go. The sad part is as you work on this you have in the back of your mind, what will happen later how bad is this going to get etc.... and you can't you have to stay in the moment and work through this because it is my fear of the future not his.
Last night Brandon had his first track practice, what I saw of it he did great. However, coming into the car he was mad and upset and kicking stones and tried to kick me. I stopped and said until he was calm we would not drive home. I know he was upset but I was not going to get into the van until he could be calm for me and his brother. He got in the van after settling down and proceeded to tell me how awful everything was. Now I think he enjoyed parts of it HOWEVER, there was a boy there that was very disrespectful to Brandon. Apparently he spit on him and hit him with a baton. Now I don't doubt these things happen, but I know from watching Brandon he was laughing and joking with this boy along with running by him at one time and going hahahaha to his face. So Brandon was not respectful to this boy. So now Brandon does not want to go. But this is a good learning tool for him. If he can remember, he needs to stay away from this boy and tell the coaches not to put them side by side on the track. I will also talked to the coaches and let them know all that happen yesterday to make them aware of this child. Let them know Brandon is learning the proper social things to do with kids that upset him, right now he looks like he is having fun with them when he is not.
I feel this is a good practice for him to work on learning to deal with these types of kids... there are 40 other kids and they are fine so Brandon found the one. Or did this child find Brandon. I don't know. He is starting school in the fall and he is worried about this happening, so while I can be there and the only thing they need to teach is running (not school) we can work on the social part. Or so I hope!!
So we had a few moments of discomfort. Brandon is still trying to have his temper tantrums like a two year old even though he is 10. He struggles with this and we struggle with this. Huge emotions for little things become exhausting for us. It is not ok to disrupt everyone when you are upset. You may be upset but making everyone miserable is not good. Disrespect has become his way of dealing and we need to teach him how to be upset but not get everyone upset. It is ok to be angry or upset but making it a huge emotion and being disrespectful is not. He is trying but he keeps forgetting. I read in another blog how they have manage to get their child to start regulating herself. Brandon does not, and some days I feel he can't and some days I feel he won't try. But I know he is trying, he can't remember what to do so we have to practice. We have to go through routines to help him. Make him stop and just sit by us and breathe. He is getting better but we have a long road to go. The sad part is as you work on this you have in the back of your mind, what will happen later how bad is this going to get etc.... and you can't you have to stay in the moment and work through this because it is my fear of the future not his.
Last night Brandon had his first track practice, what I saw of it he did great. However, coming into the car he was mad and upset and kicking stones and tried to kick me. I stopped and said until he was calm we would not drive home. I know he was upset but I was not going to get into the van until he could be calm for me and his brother. He got in the van after settling down and proceeded to tell me how awful everything was. Now I think he enjoyed parts of it HOWEVER, there was a boy there that was very disrespectful to Brandon. Apparently he spit on him and hit him with a baton. Now I don't doubt these things happen, but I know from watching Brandon he was laughing and joking with this boy along with running by him at one time and going hahahaha to his face. So Brandon was not respectful to this boy. So now Brandon does not want to go. But this is a good learning tool for him. If he can remember, he needs to stay away from this boy and tell the coaches not to put them side by side on the track. I will also talked to the coaches and let them know all that happen yesterday to make them aware of this child. Let them know Brandon is learning the proper social things to do with kids that upset him, right now he looks like he is having fun with them when he is not.
I feel this is a good practice for him to work on learning to deal with these types of kids... there are 40 other kids and they are fine so Brandon found the one. Or did this child find Brandon. I don't know. He is starting school in the fall and he is worried about this happening, so while I can be there and the only thing they need to teach is running (not school) we can work on the social part. Or so I hope!!
Thursday, June 2, 2011
going on a trip hope it helps
Brandon has been so dysregulated lately. Screaming and yelling and giving us lots of disrespect It has become exhausting. A few nights ago Don had it out with him in a loving manner.. talked about how smart he was and how much love he has but the disrespect had to stop. We came to the realization that he is emotional at 5 and is trying to set his boundaries and see what type of control he can have etc... a testing thing to us. Also he is going to a new school in a few months and that is freaking him out.. had that talk with DOn. Now Don made a comment many moons ago about going to a new school and how it was not fun and scarey.. but he never elaborated. Oops put in some strange thoughts with this child.
Both boys are nervous for going to the new school but once we get into the routine etc they will enjoy or so I hope. Anyway, after this long discussion and being held by Don for an hour or so the next day Brandon did much much better. So now we are heading to Springfield for a family vacation and I hope this continues. Now with the family vacation, Brandon does much better because we are all together and all doing the same thing and having fun for most of the time. He relaxes and can stay with us and not get too many triggers to set him off to dysregulate. We have a ball at Disney and Dells, without much trouble.. it happens with minimal food or drink or sleep... hopefully we will not have too many triggers to set him off. We shall see and I will let you know.
Both boys are nervous for going to the new school but once we get into the routine etc they will enjoy or so I hope. Anyway, after this long discussion and being held by Don for an hour or so the next day Brandon did much much better. So now we are heading to Springfield for a family vacation and I hope this continues. Now with the family vacation, Brandon does much better because we are all together and all doing the same thing and having fun for most of the time. He relaxes and can stay with us and not get too many triggers to set him off to dysregulate. We have a ball at Disney and Dells, without much trouble.. it happens with minimal food or drink or sleep... hopefully we will not have too many triggers to set him off. We shall see and I will let you know.
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