We have been open about our sons. One in particular and his struggles and disabilities. Some people see it and understand and support. Some people think you over react and are too hard on child and some don't see anything and think you are picky.
Are they right? I am sure their veiw of a "tiny" window in my world would be correct. But it is not, it is a daily lifelong challange that people don't see. I saw a quote the other day that was like BOOM that fits.
"when an FASD child has the Walls around him, he/she function fine and appear "normal" (for lack of having a word for it.) The support system is in place and it works so no one notices anything out of whack unless they are older and should be doing more than they can.
When the wall starts to come down, guess what... the child comes apart. Even if you have the wall the child may come apart. Making his world smaller is fine to help on track. but when a child is in an environment that is pure havoc and discombumbled// ... he will not adapt or learn he will add to the havoc and not stop untilled pulled down.
Do I look the other way when he is too emotionally crippled? Or do I jump in and try to help him. I still have to regulate my child. Daily, and I won't stop. He needs assistants and I get tired with having to stay on top of it, but I do. Some people see it and some don't.
I don't have perfect kids, and hey neither do you. However, I have met so many parents over the years that think there kids do no wrong. Their child doesn't do anything that would provoke, enhance or create a situation you are in with your child. It is my child.
WHy? Because I am very open about him and want to let people know he needs help and assistants and if they can't see it or won't view it than they will NOT help my child the blame will land on him.
I have been told this can occur and I have heard hundreds of stories about it and guess what? You let your guard down once and assume they "understand" your world when they don't. My child is the one in trouble. It sucks because the next hardest part of this is... he doesn't understand why.
No one talked to him in the moment and no one corrected him... or role played.. so he won't get it and what he will remember may not mean it is what happen but more of what he has heard which can work in his favor however, it can be devastating... I hope someday the world or people can look at themselves and ask "how can I help" or "how to make the world safer, enjoyable" and not "it not's my problem"
So for now, I am going to have to close the world in and work with my child and if people wonder why a middle school child is never home alone, or is supervised by adults and rushed home when things get too havoc... and find the things I know he can do and maybe if someone truely wants to help I may let them in our world.
Are they right? I am sure their veiw of a "tiny" window in my world would be correct. But it is not, it is a daily lifelong challange that people don't see. I saw a quote the other day that was like BOOM that fits.
"when an FASD child has the Walls around him, he/she function fine and appear "normal" (for lack of having a word for it.) The support system is in place and it works so no one notices anything out of whack unless they are older and should be doing more than they can.
When the wall starts to come down, guess what... the child comes apart. Even if you have the wall the child may come apart. Making his world smaller is fine to help on track. but when a child is in an environment that is pure havoc and discombumbled// ... he will not adapt or learn he will add to the havoc and not stop untilled pulled down.
Do I look the other way when he is too emotionally crippled? Or do I jump in and try to help him. I still have to regulate my child. Daily, and I won't stop. He needs assistants and I get tired with having to stay on top of it, but I do. Some people see it and some don't.
I don't have perfect kids, and hey neither do you. However, I have met so many parents over the years that think there kids do no wrong. Their child doesn't do anything that would provoke, enhance or create a situation you are in with your child. It is my child.
WHy? Because I am very open about him and want to let people know he needs help and assistants and if they can't see it or won't view it than they will NOT help my child the blame will land on him.
I have been told this can occur and I have heard hundreds of stories about it and guess what? You let your guard down once and assume they "understand" your world when they don't. My child is the one in trouble. It sucks because the next hardest part of this is... he doesn't understand why.
No one talked to him in the moment and no one corrected him... or role played.. so he won't get it and what he will remember may not mean it is what happen but more of what he has heard which can work in his favor however, it can be devastating... I hope someday the world or people can look at themselves and ask "how can I help" or "how to make the world safer, enjoyable" and not "it not's my problem"
So for now, I am going to have to close the world in and work with my child and if people wonder why a middle school child is never home alone, or is supervised by adults and rushed home when things get too havoc... and find the things I know he can do and maybe if someone truely wants to help I may let them in our world.
