http://www.wrex.com/story/16919236/200-singers-perform-at
Boys performed witht he festival of choirs... don't know how long this video will last....
Monday, February 13, 2012
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
It is the little things
Last night I went into my son's room while he was sleeping to check on him one more time before I went to bed. I ususally give the boys one more kiss while they are sleeping. As I left the dark room that didn't have a night light on or any music on.... I had a moment. And then I had to stop and think...
When he first came to us, age 2, he would be placed in his crib and we would sing and rock him to sleep, but he would not go to sleep. He stayed awake, part of what he had learn in the orphanage and he was a baby with an on switch./ fear (?).. he took hours to go to sleep. Early childhood told us to leave him alone and he would go to sleep.. :(
Then he was 5 and we had attachment issues or so we thought. I started laying with him until he would fall asleep. I would be with him for hours.... sometimes two hours and sometime as quickly as an half hour. It all depended on his day however, he really could not communicate this too me.
By 7, we gave up and just brought him into our room to sleep. He slept at my side of the bed and when he awoke I would be right there for him. His brother thought this was great and quickly joined the camp out in our room. They stayed for over a year in our bedroom. Two boys felt better sleeping on our floor and feeling safe and happy. Josh even wonder where his wife and kids would sleep.:)
By 9, we moved Brandon and his brother into a sleeping room. They shared a room just for sleep, there were no toys or personal stuff. Just the books they read at night, their radio alarm clocks and a night light to share. They slept in that room and when they would complain about each other we would just say, well you have your own room. This kept them together until they were ready.
He will be turning 11 in March, he is now sleeping in his own room, in his own bed and without a night light or noises. He is sleeping... still have waking up issues (another post) but less and less. He is very proud of himself and so am I. He is growing up.... makes me kind of sad and happy. Yes, Josh likes sleeping in his own room with his own stuff... (but still has a night light) :)
When he first came to us, age 2, he would be placed in his crib and we would sing and rock him to sleep, but he would not go to sleep. He stayed awake, part of what he had learn in the orphanage and he was a baby with an on switch./ fear (?).. he took hours to go to sleep. Early childhood told us to leave him alone and he would go to sleep.. :(
Then he was 5 and we had attachment issues or so we thought. I started laying with him until he would fall asleep. I would be with him for hours.... sometimes two hours and sometime as quickly as an half hour. It all depended on his day however, he really could not communicate this too me.
By 7, we gave up and just brought him into our room to sleep. He slept at my side of the bed and when he awoke I would be right there for him. His brother thought this was great and quickly joined the camp out in our room. They stayed for over a year in our bedroom. Two boys felt better sleeping on our floor and feeling safe and happy. Josh even wonder where his wife and kids would sleep.:)
By 9, we moved Brandon and his brother into a sleeping room. They shared a room just for sleep, there were no toys or personal stuff. Just the books they read at night, their radio alarm clocks and a night light to share. They slept in that room and when they would complain about each other we would just say, well you have your own room. This kept them together until they were ready.
He will be turning 11 in March, he is now sleeping in his own room, in his own bed and without a night light or noises. He is sleeping... still have waking up issues (another post) but less and less. He is very proud of himself and so am I. He is growing up.... makes me kind of sad and happy. Yes, Josh likes sleeping in his own room with his own stuff... (but still has a night light) :)
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Life goes on
It seems so long ago that my mom passed, and yet it was only one week ago today. We have had the funeral and sent the thank yous and now life goes on. Today is really the first day that I can sit alone and think of the past week. I cry and get sad and then it is like she is still here.
My mom and I used to talk on the phone all the time. I would give her an update of my boys and all that has been happening. I lost that phone privileged last summer when she no longer wanted to talk. She didn't have the energy and she just got tired of saying... I am sitting around in pain. I could call once in awhile and update but it wasn't the same. I realized over the past week she had stop looking at my emails since October, she had no strengthed to go to the computer room and open up her mail. Was it because she had no physical strength or mental strength I don't know.
But from the holidays on, she looked tired and worn out, sad and calm. She was ready to go to the Lord. She had no more strength in this world. The person who is suffering now the most is my dad. He took great care of her during her illness always believing she would get better. I think somewhere I knew in my heart it wasn't going to be. I just didn't know when it would happen. I can honestly say she did go peacefully and really is in a better place. I think someone gave us a long time to say goodbye. So, I hope whoever reads this, make sure you let the ones around you know how much you care and really appreciate them.
My mom and I used to talk on the phone all the time. I would give her an update of my boys and all that has been happening. I lost that phone privileged last summer when she no longer wanted to talk. She didn't have the energy and she just got tired of saying... I am sitting around in pain. I could call once in awhile and update but it wasn't the same. I realized over the past week she had stop looking at my emails since October, she had no strengthed to go to the computer room and open up her mail. Was it because she had no physical strength or mental strength I don't know.
But from the holidays on, she looked tired and worn out, sad and calm. She was ready to go to the Lord. She had no more strength in this world. The person who is suffering now the most is my dad. He took great care of her during her illness always believing she would get better. I think somewhere I knew in my heart it wasn't going to be. I just didn't know when it would happen. I can honestly say she did go peacefully and really is in a better place. I think someone gave us a long time to say goodbye. So, I hope whoever reads this, make sure you let the ones around you know how much you care and really appreciate them.
After a long struggled ..Mom passed peacefully and will be dearly missed
| Kathryn "Mary Kay" M. Lindsay |
KATHRYN “MARY KAY” M. LINDSAY (NEE: BISHOP) RACINE Surrounded by her loving family, Kathryn “Mary Kay” M. Lindsay, passed away Wednesday, January 25, 2012, at Wheaton-Franciscan All Saints Medical Center. She was born in Monmouth, IL, September 1, 1934, daughter of the late William J. and Mary E. (Nee: Pearson) Bishop. On June 9, 1956 in Monmouth, IL she was united in marriage to Robert E. Lindsay. An avid tennis player, Mary Kay assisted her husband, Bob for over forty years organizing the city tennis programs. She was an excellent seamstress. More than anything, she treasured time spent with her family, and will forever be remembered as a loving and devoted wife, mother, and grandmother. She will be dearly missed. Survivors include her loving husband of fifty-five years, Bob; her children, Linda (Tom) Groose of Glendale, WI, Laura (Scott) French of Racine, Lisa (Don) Sattler of Poplar Grove, IL, RJ Lindsay of Racine; her eight grandchildren, Matthew and Adam Groose, Jennifer, Rachel, and Samuel French, Brandon and Josh Sattler, Nick Lindsay; brother, Richard (Jeanne) Bishop of Monmouth, IL; sister, Doris Reigel of TX; sister-in-law, Patsy (Jim) Glenn of Aledo, IL; nieces, nephews, other relatives and many dear friends. In addition to her parents she was preceded in death by two sisters and four brothers. Funeral services will be held Saturday, January 28, 2012, 11:30 A.M. at Trinity United Methodist Church, 3825 Erie Street, with Rev. Rosiland Dryver-Scott officiating. Private interment will follow at Country Haven Cemetery, Caledonia. Relatives and friends may meet with the family Saturday at the church from 9:30 A.M. until time of service at 11:30 A.M. Memorials to the Northside Food Pantry or to the Racine Public Library have been suggested. A very special thank you to Dr. Michael Mullane and his wonderful staff, and to Wheaton-Franciscan staff, especially the nurses in oncology during her last hours for their loving and compassionate care. |
Monday, January 16, 2012
silly me
We are off of school today and the last two nights or three Brandon' has not slept well. So today I felt that maybe having his ADHD meds all the time was keeping him up or lack of sleep because even if they weren't in his system I think they are...
So far we have had an ok day. A bit of swearing and LOTS OF YELLING, do they go deaf when not on meds?
I say silly me because in some way I think he should be able to control himself... and this is very difficult.
So far we have had an ok day. A bit of swearing and LOTS OF YELLING, do they go deaf when not on meds?
I say silly me because in some way I think he should be able to control himself... and this is very difficult.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Testing the limits
One thing I have learned about a child with FAS is practice practice practice and patience. My lovely son needs to be in the moment to learn something or routinely go over many times so he understands. He is quite smart but very forgetful and impulsive.
We are learning one of the best tools to help him learn is sitting. It sounds so good and terrible. Yet, going to bed is very difficult for him. He is off his meds so he can't think and he gets very impulsive. So we are now making him sit before bed. Basically to clear his mind. He just sits for 1/2 hour. He is in the kitchen (center of the house) and either Don or I are there cleaning or making lunches for the am. He is free to talk to us and engage in proper conversation but he can't hold a toy or read just sit and talk. And if he can't talk respectfully we do not engage in conversation.
So why do we do this? It makes him work his mind, what is on his mind and how to communicate what is on his mind. Everyone needs sleep but he is afraid of sleep... but not afraid of sleep he is afraid of the new day of going to school, what the next day will bring, how bad was his current day and am I a good boy or bad since I get redirected??? So many thoughts going in so many different directions and how do you deal with them when you can't put them into a category for your brain to digest into proper categories due to a disability that you didn't cause can be very frustrating. Just sitting and thinking about it helps, it helps Brandon learn where to put his frustrations and what is really big and what are things he does not need to worry about.
These are things that don't come out of his mouth or thoughts until he sits. At night time they creep in and it is the best time to talk. Or not to talk. We have been doing this for a week and I notice two very important things.... One he complains about sitting yet every night he quickly and respectfully goes to his chair to sit, there is no arguing no fighting, he is a peace doing this. The second thing is during the day... he makes comments about things we have taught him. One example that comes to mind is Brandon used to come home and swear a lot... very disresptful and the other day I had a moment and said a bad word (twice in a day it slipped) and my son very calmly and patiencely said Mom we do not say those words. Which I had agreeed and corrected myself with the help from my son. He is calmer during the day.
Our morning rituals of getting ready are getting better. He is learning he can make good choices with out meds.... it just takes practice practice practice..
We are learning one of the best tools to help him learn is sitting. It sounds so good and terrible. Yet, going to bed is very difficult for him. He is off his meds so he can't think and he gets very impulsive. So we are now making him sit before bed. Basically to clear his mind. He just sits for 1/2 hour. He is in the kitchen (center of the house) and either Don or I are there cleaning or making lunches for the am. He is free to talk to us and engage in proper conversation but he can't hold a toy or read just sit and talk. And if he can't talk respectfully we do not engage in conversation.
So why do we do this? It makes him work his mind, what is on his mind and how to communicate what is on his mind. Everyone needs sleep but he is afraid of sleep... but not afraid of sleep he is afraid of the new day of going to school, what the next day will bring, how bad was his current day and am I a good boy or bad since I get redirected??? So many thoughts going in so many different directions and how do you deal with them when you can't put them into a category for your brain to digest into proper categories due to a disability that you didn't cause can be very frustrating. Just sitting and thinking about it helps, it helps Brandon learn where to put his frustrations and what is really big and what are things he does not need to worry about.
These are things that don't come out of his mouth or thoughts until he sits. At night time they creep in and it is the best time to talk. Or not to talk. We have been doing this for a week and I notice two very important things.... One he complains about sitting yet every night he quickly and respectfully goes to his chair to sit, there is no arguing no fighting, he is a peace doing this. The second thing is during the day... he makes comments about things we have taught him. One example that comes to mind is Brandon used to come home and swear a lot... very disresptful and the other day I had a moment and said a bad word (twice in a day it slipped) and my son very calmly and patiencely said Mom we do not say those words. Which I had agreeed and corrected myself with the help from my son. He is calmer during the day.
Our morning rituals of getting ready are getting better. He is learning he can make good choices with out meds.... it just takes practice practice practice..
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
OK I will try - Photos
I was told to put more photos.... here goes
Lego Police Station
Christmas Morning at our house
Family photo at Grandma's
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