Can I breathe?

Today I received a compliment about one of my boys.  They had notice his growth and his maturity.  WOW this is the child I am constantly feeling like I struggle with and hope and pray he will mature...
I worry about his future, is there hope are we going in the right direction, what else can I do??

Well I guess we are doing the right thing.  We are learning to balance what needs to challenged and when to rescue.  Knowing all the hard work you are doing in rasing a child with an invisible diability is working... makes you breathe.

We will have constant struggles and hurdles, but know you are headed in the correct path or it seems make it great.  I heard this awhile ago by another parent of an ADHD child, so we keep chopping away at it.

Breathe, breathe breathe breathe...

Summer is Coming

Today is our last day of school!! Yeah.  Hopefully our summer will be fun even though it will be short and sweet.  We have our pool pases but with this weather don't know if we will be using.  We will be traveling a lot to WI to check up on my sister and my dad.

This is the summer for my dad without my mom.  Kind of sad, but the season changes are hard on him.  I am hoping he makes it through the first year.  He has his ups and downs and he is opening up in many ways and my sister's are able to make a new connection to a man I knew.  I worked with my father and spent many hours with him that I learn how to hear him.  My sister's did not.  They are learning now and is nice to see.

I hope I post enough this summer to keep track of the lovely little moments we tend to frustrate over only to discover later it was nothing.  Yet, to charish the wonderful moments we have.

We traveled to WI so the boys could attend a football camp with the Green Bay Packers.  We had a great time and the boys really enjoyed it.  We stayed overnight and in the night I heard Brandon making noises so I went to him and pick him up to take to the bathroom.... as I scooped him up my little guy cuddled into my arms and still so much asleep said "I lover you mommy."  How sweet is that.

Brandon is growing and having his growing pains, but moments like this..... melt your heart.

Post pictures soon.

End of Year

Getting a bit nervous.... Brandon has a major project that is due tomorrow and I have a feeling he won't finish.  This will turn his grade from a "C" to a "D".  What anger me more is that I thik the project should have been adjusted a bit for him.  It has not.

The other child has decided to be a smart mouth with one of the teachers and got written up.  I am not happy with this but he is a yacker at the end of year.  He is a talker in the classroom but man it gets worse at the end of year.

School fun or not

Brandon came home the other day and said there was a fight at school during recess.  I said oh really and he said "yes and everyone got suspended but me"  Why were you not suspended?  "I don't know."  Were you involved?  "no, it was between Taylor and Mason" and so it explained why he wasnt'.  We carried on a conversation of what happenand and other boys names were mention and no clear reasoning of anything.  He said he was called into the conference room to give his verson and Mrs. "P" let him go because he was not involved.. But some kids were suspended.  So we left it at that and I knew he would be out of sorts but he was done talking about it. 

Now here is where a FAS child needs help and guidance.  We got home and we started homework and Brandon was mad at everything.  I mean everything.  He didn't have the right pencil, he didn't understand his homework, he got mad at his brother.  He would not let Josh and I talk together, he was in a state of anger.  So I made him sit... ( this was not done calmly I must admit).  I was at my wits end.... and I had enought because I knew I could not reach him.  So he sat, and after a while I recieved a phone call.  A friend asking me to play bunko (?) and she asked me how Brandon was.  I was like he was upset why??  Well it turns out at some point during the recess fight Brandon was down on the ground and he had wood chips kicked in his face...

Now I can understand why my child is upset.  He is hurt.  I knew he was hurt before but asking what happen didn't involve my child but it did.  So now I go and ask him about the wood chips.  He said Mason flipped him when he was angry and kicked wood chips in his face.  HORRIBLE so my son was involved and hurt and I received no phone call.  I am mad.   I tried to find out from Brandon what has happen and his story keeps changing... at one time he was flipped then he flipped someone, more kids are involved... I can't really keep track.  Even calmly starting over the story changes. 

So when Don gets home, I have him talk with Brandon while I go to soccer practice with Josh.  When I get home Don has let Brandon vent for 40 minutes and he knows nothing more except Brandon had seem to have moved on and they tried to do homework and Brandon was emotionally gone.  Brandon has obsessed over this for so long he can't seem to focus on anything else.   

So I give him a bath and treat him like a baby.  He has emotionally gone to that level to feel secure, this is fine by me.  He is unable to complete anything so a calm bath, treating sweetly like a baby and a snuggle in bed calms him.  He can go to sleep.

The next day I email the principle and this is what I recieved:
 

Hello!  Yes, I dealt with the students involved yesterday.  My take on it was that there were two students arguing back and forth.  Another student came over to join in b/c he was upset at the student arguing with his friend. Then, two more students joined in.  Being a total of 5 students involved (not including Brandon).  Brandon somehow was in the middle of it, but not directly involved.  He said he was pushed down (although we couldn’t figure out by who) and that he was in the woodchips.  Believe or not, when we had the five students  in the room (Brandon was there briefly as well), they were all very honest and clear as to what happened, except for Brandon’s involvement.  They said he wasn’t involved but they weren’t sure how he was there and on the ground.  So, Brandon was sent back to class.

Does this help?  Not really, except we believe Brandon knows all the kids involved.. and he is troubled by their lack of friendship he doesn't know how to cope.  Was he flipped by the boy?  I don't think so, I think he dramatically fell to the ground during the altercation and while the kids were shuffling around chips got on his face.  Because at some point, when the noon aides arrive he was able to walk away with another friend.  He was at the sideline, not directly invloved...and as he was trying to tell us what happen he was all the other kids involved.  He cannot put what happened into the right folder of his brain to grasp what is happening.  Learning how to handle this takes lots of patience and lots of practice to understand.  

Constant changes

I haven't post in a while and everytime lately when I go to post they are changing things on the website.  I don't know if I like the new format to post because I get used to the way things are and I struggle with the changes.  However, once I use the new way I am fine, but I am a creature of habit.

Now I know how my kids feel when they think they know how their universe works and it gets changed.  I never realized what a creature of habit I was.  I also thought I like to go with the wind but I am really learning I don't.  so changing my website design it not making me happy right now.

But I think over time I will like it better.   Now I am going to see if this posts.

Easter Sunday

As for the Easter morning.... they loved their eggs. My kids (one does not) eat candy that often, it is not a big deal and the other can physically use the extra calories but the sugar is WHOA too much. So instead of a lot of candy I ended up putting in notes that I had typed up for the kids to use.  They pulled out these white strips of  paper that said such things as...... such as 10 minutes of basketball with Dad or Mom, a lunch with dad (home or away), a piece of candy or gum at the check out when we go to the store, some wii time during the school week, an ice cream at McDonald's or a trip to the dollar store where they can use their own monies, extra reading time with mom or dad, and some extra cuddle time with mom. 

Josh got on the band wagon right away.  He wanted to know if it had to be a lunch with dad and ended up going out to breakfast with his Dad and got some alone time.  Loved the idea of going to McDonald's when he was ready.  He really enjoyed them and still can enjoy them for awhile.  I think Josh was afraid he wouldn't be able to use them so he was rushing to get them all in at Easter.... we reminded him he had all the time he needed to use them.

The start of EAster break was ... welll not so pleasant.   We had to work with the boys in reguards to appreciating what we have and how to respect each other.  Seems to me around the holiday they get a bit greedy and forget the true meaning of what we are celebrating for.  A few extra directions from Mom and Dad and I know the respecting each other was appreciated by all.  

When school gets out, they tend to forget that they can still be respectful to each other and it isn't a quest to see who can get the other upset.  They treat each other so disrespectful that we had a few practices on how to talk to each other.  It really starts at home.  And they really do admit it is easier and not that difficult to be respectful... just some reminder practice. :)

Family Vacations

Don and I are in the process of trying to figure out our family vacation for this year.  We wanted to go to Disney but the castle's weren't going to be complete that we decided to wait.  Now it just seems everything else is so expensive that it is hard to plan.  We keep talking of going to the Smokies but can't settle on a cabin and whether to go in Summer or Fall.  It gets confusing and then the prices are just as high!! OUCH

Let's see we are planning on braces for one and tackle football for another and a trip???  Too much to think about and then Don did not want trip insurance and I looked at him and said... lost my mom and my sister is recovering and who knows what could happen and then he said ok.  Since a year ago we would not have even believed where we are today.   Count your blessings